Thanks to everyone who contributes to this rather outrageous collection of music and musician jokes.

Your may find more music humor, crazy headlines, dumb blond jokes, and others in the Joke Time section in Vermont Living Magazine.

Please email your demented musician jokes to info@musiconnection.com and we will eventually add them to this page.

A young child says to his mother, "Mom, when I grow up I'd like to be a musician." She replies, "Well honey, you know you can't do both."

Q: What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?
A: A tattoo.

Q: What's the difference between a banjo and a fish?
A: You can tuna fish.

Q: What's the difference between a banjo and an onion?
A: Nobody cries when you chop up a banjo.

Q: What do you call a drummer in a three-piece suit?
A: "The Defendant"

Q: What do clarinetists use for birth control?
A: Their personalities.

Q: What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?
A: Saliva.

Q: What do you call a guitar player without a girlfriend?
A: Homeless.

Laugh on.